SouthFresh

Food.

I’ve been enormously spoiled (maybe a bad choice in words when speaking of food) by having lived the major portion of my life in California. California, being geographically positioned within walking distance of every other place on the face of the world has a fantastic array of restaurants, eateries, bistros, diners and greasy spoons serving just about any type of food one could desire as well as some questionable delicasies one might not (think: chicken sushi). |inline

someone: Office job vs. outside job?
me: I prefer air conditioning
someone: maybe that’s why your all fucked up
someone: you need some fresh air
me: Sure, after it passes through my air conditioner

I could say that only in Georgia might I have expected this, but since I was completely dumbfounded by the site, and having been in Georgia at the time it appears that I couldn’t have expected it here either but a Ford Taurus with Bull Horns mounted on the grill?

Moo.

If you haven’t heard, and I would be surprised if you haven’t, Pat “I love anyone and everyone so long as they’re me” Robertson has claimed to have leg-pressed 2000 pounds.

I just like my version of how this came about:

Pat Robertson “God hates the gays. Atheists will burn in hell. Dude, check out my glutes are they rock hard or what?”

Maybe I’m just spoiled with the give-aways and prizes offered by companies in California to places like Cancun, Hawaii, even Baja California, makes the prospect of entering a contest out here in Georgia for a week long trip in Idaho not that exciting.

Idaho?

Its sad enough if you end up a prostitute. Its even worse when your chosen corner is right outside a Waffle House.

A Waffle House.

You’re a prostitute and you stand in front of a place that sells this:

someone: no sleep?
me: Well, only a little more non-sleep than normally is accompanied by my non waking hours
me: …How much more convoluted could I have made that sentence?
someone: im still reading it

Anyone else get the problem where after eating a bunch of Cheez-It “Baked Snack Crackers” you end up with this Cheez-It sludge stuck behind your rear-most upper molars? It’s tempting to eat a bunch of these tasty treats in an effort to see how far out I can force my cheeks. Right now I could easily scrape enough post-chewing Cheez-It goo off of my teeth to form and bake another bag of these things.

On a side-note apparently geese like Cheez-It crackers. After eating a few they started hissing at me, which I assume is Goosian for “Gimme Milk.” At the very least I figure that the 250% sodium content of these crackers will make those geese pretty tasty.

The BBC; Somehow it seems to be required to use the definite-article form when referring the The BBC. Bastian of fine reporting, capable of creating fantastic, depth filled dramas and docmentaries.

Then they air Benny Hill.

huh?

lunchbox: I don’t need to see anymore boobies.
lunchbox: Trust me.
me: Oh, come on!
me: There’s always room for boobies.