There comes a time in every person’s life when they must stop and realize that they’ve been walking around for so long wearing nothing but socks that maybe one of their socks has decided to go on strike and completely rotate around their foot.
One of these things is not like the other....
me: I had a really strange and intense set of dreams about super heroes.
me: In my dream, one of the super heroes tried to make me into a hero by chopping off half my thumb and attaching a crab’s claw to it.
me: Ok, that sounds a lot weirder typed out than it does in my head
bearded wonder: That’s a shitty hero, man.
bearded wonder: Crab-hand man
bearded wonder: could be a fun cartoon character
me: “So, what’s your super power?”
“I can create buttery dipping sauce.”
me: “And some people are alergic to me.”
bearded wonder: It’s like an even bigger loser version of Edward Scissor Hands
me: Edmund Crabby Thumb.
bearded wonder: lol
bearded wonder: Ew
bearded wonder: Partner of Tammy Stinky Pinky
I was having some issues today with my AIM and wanted to make sure that I had the most up to date version. When I got the download, the following page showed up;
What the fuck is eating his face?
I’m going through the “Create Your Own Level” tutorials on “Little Big Planet” for the PS3. I’ve decided this game is awesome and has increased its awesomness quotient by having a British accent.
If the tutorial’s voice over had, for example, a Canadian accent I would have to decrease its awesomeness quotient.
While standing on line for a Toy Story themed ride at Disney’s Hollywood Studios if found myself surrounded by larger than life crayons used to guide us through the line towards the actual ride. This triggered a memory that I doubt few out there would share.
I remember quite distinctly how on many occassions my friends and I would feed their dog Crayola Crayons because later on their yard would be littered with multi-colored dog poo.
Ahhhh childhood.
Ladies,you’re missing the point of a clear strap bra if it’s digging the equivalent of the Marianas Trench in your back
Just left that demonic spawn of satan, “It’s a small world.” I would have thought that someone before me would have found the exiting imagery of a boy spanking his dingo with his boomerang to be slightly inappropriate for a children’s ride.
And no, the irony of seeing a woman wearing a burkah standing on line for a ride based on Alladin is not lost on me
I just heard a story on the radio and spent a good ten minutes attempting and failing to come up with something, anything, that could up the comedic value of a story about ginormous qauntities of cocaine being found stuffed into frozen sharks. I’m still waiting to see if they had lasers mounted on their heads.
